What Makes You Different Is What Makes You Beautiful....

Well it happened again....It always kinda happens...

In little ways like someone subtly saying "sorry" or giving me eyes filled with pity...But today really threw me off...I dressed Pip up super cute to go meet my friend's lovely little twins...SideNote: How bloody special are twins- My mom is one & my whole life, I've teased her about how "intense" their relationship is...But seeing two little babes together like that made it make more sense...So there you go Mum & Tia...



So Pip was looking extra cute & getting a bit more attention than usual at the grocery store...I swear taking her anywhere is something to see- she's like a magnet...Sucks out "Oh my goodness aren't you cute" type comments from almost everyone she sees before they even realize they are talking...


As such after a lady commented on how cute Pip was, she leaned in and said in a quieter voice, "But what is wrong with her?" to which I replied, "Absolutely nothing", smiled and whisked my darling & our dignity away...


I didn't mean to come across as rude or short but I wanted to make sure I made enough of a statement that this lady, thinks about what happened, thinks about how she could have approached the situation a bit differently...


I honestly have no problem people asking questions...I get that people might be curious...Heck I am known to my friends as "Barbara freaking Walters" because I ask a zillion questions a minute...


But here's the thing friends...Yes she has Down syndrome...Yes she has glasses and yes she sometimes even has a bloody patch...But there is nothing WRONG with her...I would hope that no one would approach me with such words when Noal is around...First off because I don't want him associating Down syndrome with it meaning something is wrong or broken...And second because Noal might not be as diplomatic as I am...He already put a 5 year old in her place and let me tell you, he will be raised knowing different is not WRONG...Different is beautiful...Different is cool...Different is special..And it's awesome that we all just that...







This beautiful message is hanging in Pip's room & I look at it everyday and think this is part of Pip's purpose...To show others that "What Makes You Different Is What Makes You Beautiful"...

37 comments:

  1. Anonymous30.1.14

    Very dignified, I don't know if I could have been so nice when put on the spot. I would never expect someone to say something so rude, but I have heard a lot of rude things in my life. I have a red birth mark under my eye and have heard "who punched you?" Along w numerous other rude questions it just baffles me the nerve of people to say something offensive to a total stranger! Good job handling yourself!

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    1. Anonymous4.5.14

      My nephew, who is the light of my life, is now 36 and was born with down syndrome, was walking down the street one day and walking the other way was an elderly lady with a walker. She had the most miserable look on her face that was sad. When she saw Mike he smiled at her and she looked at him and had the most beautiful smile on her face, it looked like a light came on and I am sure it made her day. He lives with me and every day he brings joy to my life. They should call it Ups syndrome because that what he does to people by just being so wonderful. You are very lucky, and it just gets better the older they get. She is just so beautiful and she looks very happy.

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  2. Lisa Buck30.1.14

    Amen!!!! I was born with Spina Bifida. I am 46 and still dealing with "I pity you" and "What's wrong with you?". There is absolutely nothing wrong with me. I just enjoy my life a little differently than most people, but I do enjoy my life. There is NOTHING wrong with me. I don't catch and I'm not sick. Neither is little Pip! She' just beautiful!!!! <3
    P.S. Sorry about the rant.

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  3. Anonymous30.1.14

    Well I love this story. Different is great. What a sad world it would be if we were all the same. Pip is adorable. I love her smile and the bow in her hair. I can't wait to see what she does in the world when she grows up. So keep on posting. I love her smile.

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  4. A lovely post, once again and I like the other replies above - good on you Lisa Buck, too.

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  5. Anonymous31.1.14

    Tara; Unfortunately, in my opinion, that woman was "stupid" (sorry!) and again unfortunately---"you can't fix stupid"!! Sorry kind of harsh but people like her annoy me to no end! Pip is beautiful and a blessing and you are so right---there is absolutely nothing "wrong" with her!

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  6. well done you. I have been asked that question before and
    gave exactly the same reply, their is absolutely nothing wrong with my daughter shes perfect thankyou very much
    xoxoxox

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  7. well done you. I have been asked that question before and
    gave exactly the same reply, their is absolutely nothing wrong with my daughter shes perfect thankyou very much
    xoxoxox

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  8. Anonymous31.1.14

    Great story to share with others! Amen sister :)

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  9. Anonymous31.1.14

    Pip is a wonderful teacher. I've worked with infants and toddlers with "special needs" for more than 20 years. I have come to understand they are here to teach us. They teach us how to be caring, kind, compassionate, loving, and accepting. They teach us how to be what we were born to be.

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  10. Your stories stir up such strong emotions in me. Just like the one with the little brat (lol) calling Pip broken, this makes me nervous for my day. I haven't really had it happen yet, but I know it will and I don't know how I will handle it. Ben is 6 months on Wednesday. He is the same way drawing people in like "magnets" as you say when we go out. With the broken story, I literally wanted to, pardon my French, bitch slap a 5 year old girl and now I want to do it to an old lady! Thank you for posting. I know I am rambling but I do hope when it happens to me I can remember that little pic of Pip smiling next to the beautiful sign and maintain my diplomacy as well. Xoxox

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  11. People never cease to amaze me! These comments will only make your family stronger Tara, and I love the manner in which you deal with them. Different is what makes each person special in their own way! We have some mutual friends, so I hope to one day meet you and your beautiful family.
    P.S Love the pictures, she is a princess

    Nicole Godin

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  12. My niece was born with a few hemangiomas on her face and one under her lower eyelid (discovered later after the small ones on her face started spreading). The one that was under her eyelid (on the inside) caused her eye to bulge a bit, and also become slightly crossed. My sister was *forever* getting stares, whispers and questions. She was a basket case about it, and usually tried to explain hemangiomas to people, without much success. Finally, I'd had enough. We were out one day shopping, and a lady walked up and said, "Poor dear. What happened to her? What's wrong with her?" Well let me tell you what--*I* piped up and answered this one. I looked at my niece, then back at the woman,and smiled. I asked her, "I'm not sure what you mean." The woman pointed at her and said, "Her face. What are those red patches, and why is her eye like that?" I looked back at my niece, then back at the woman. With a very puzzled look on my face, I said, "I really have no idea what you're talking about. There is NOTHING wrong with my niece." The woman started to say something else, then I think it finally sank in, she turned so red she was nearly purple, and she walked away. Honest to God, I don't know what's wrong with some people. It's bad enough to stare and/or point, but some people have some serious gall to actually confront someone about it. It blows my mind.

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  13. Anonymous31.1.14

    I think your daughter is gorgeous!!

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  14. Anonymous31.1.14

    Sorry that happened to you. There was another story on the Saving Down Syndrome FB page yesterday that is very similar to yours, except it was much worse. http://thesumulong3.blogspot.com/2014/01/out-of-bounds.html I can't believe people can be so rude. I love that picture your Pip has next to her--so true.

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  15. Anonymous31.1.14

    I love this blog!! I have had this experience many times. My daughter has Rett Syndrome. One time in particular was when my son was about 3 years old. A lady in a doctor's office waiting room leaned over and asked what was wrong with her (while pointing at my daughter who was about 6 at the time). Before I could open my mouth, my 3 year old said - There's nothing wrong with her, God made her that way. What's wrong with you?

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  16. Anonymous31.1.14

    First of all, Pip is gorgeous!! When I read this I was saddened that this even happened. I have such a hard time understanding how people can be so blunt and rude. I also have a little one who happens to have Down Syndrome and the one thing I really worry about is how others will treat him. "I wouldn't change you for the world but I would change the world for you" is so fitting to where my life is right now...

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  17. You handled that brilliantly! Way to preach it :)

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  18. She is just so beautiful :)

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  19. I'm impatient so......never read the whole blog :-).I just scrolled down and at the end I saw these beautiful pics of a beautiful human being who one day is going to grow up and make this little world of ours a more beautiful place to live in. Those who can't see it,I just feel bad for them.
    God bless and best of luck :-)

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  20. Pip needs her own line of greeting cards! These pictures just made my day. Sweet Pip you are so adorable I could just "eat you up!" By the way, my daughter is adopted from China and people tell us all the time how "special" I am for adopting and she is for being adopted. It is just ridiculous. So much so we look at each other, roll our eyes (after they've walked away) and say, "Oh it so hard to be so special!" It is so ridiculous.

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  21. I got to this blog from a link on Huffington post. You and your children are wonderful. Good job, mom, they are happy and smiling at you.

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  22. Hi there.

    First I want to say congratulations for your beautiful family. Now I need to tell you that you have an obligation with your daughter and other people with Down syndrome, you need to be the first one who needs to be tolerance with people, with ignorant people, there are many people in this big world who are ignorant and because of that people are mean and hateful, so you and your family need to teach people how amazing, incredible, beautiful and wonderful Pip is. And I think you are thinking, who is this girl that she thinks she can tell what I need to do? Well let me tell you who am I.

    My name is Berenice, I’m a mexican woman who studies Archaeology and I have a extraordinary little niece named Martha and she is a wonderful tiny human who has Down syndrome just like your beautiful Pip. But Martha is not an incredible person just because of her syndrome. Martha is the most intelligent girl I ever met, she is funny, she loves all girly things, she is the one smart ass in her class (kindergarten), she loves take pictures of everything, and she is only six years old. In September she’s going to start elementary school and we are so proud of her, specially her parents. I hope that one day she become a professional photographer or something she likes because she’s amazing and I love her so much just like the rest of our family.

    I share a little piece of my life because I want you to know that I’m doing my part to teach people that people like Martha and Pip are unique people who deserve respect, love, tolerance, and acceptance like any other human.

    Have a good day and a beautiful life.

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  23. Hi there.

    First I want to say congratulations for your beautiful family. Now I need to tell you that you have an obligation with your daughter and other people with Down syndrome, you need to be the first one who needs to be tolerance with people, with ignorant people, there are many people in this big world who are ignorant and because of that people are mean and hateful, so you and your family need to teach people how amazing, incredible, beautiful and wonderful Pip is. And I think you are thinking, who is this girl that she thinks she can tell what I need to do? Well let me tell you who am I.

    My name is Berenice, I’m a mexican woman who studies Archaeology and I have a extraordinary little niece named Martha and she is a wonderful tiny human who has Down syndrome just like your beautiful Pip. But Martha is not an incredible person just because of her syndrome. Martha is the most intelligent girl I ever met, she is funny, she loves all girly things, she is the one smart ass in her class (kindergarten), she loves take pictures of everything, and she is only six years old. In September she’s going to start elementary school and we are so proud of her, specially her parents. I hope that one day she become a professional photographer or something she likes because she’s amazing and I love her so much just like the rest of our family.

    I share a little piece of my life because I want you to know that I’m doing my part to teach people that people like Martha and Pip are unique people who deserve respect, love, tolerance, and acceptance like any other human.


    Have a good day and a beautiful life.

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  24. This was such a beautiful post and you have an even more beautiful daughter and family! I'm raising a wee one myself and this message is the most important to me. Your little girl is changing the world, one sweet smile at a time :)

    I wish you all the best,

    Lauren
    www.foreverfireflying.com

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  25. she is so so beautiful! we've recently had international media attention due to my son (cataracts) and he too often gets "what is wring with him" comments, but be proud - she is so amazing! pls pass over my blog sometime (through these lenses.com) xx

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  26. I enjoyed reading your blog! We have a 9 month old little angel who has Down Syndrome. She is the light of our lives in so many ways! She has opened doors and pushed us into a world we didn't even realized existed. We had four boys before getting our girl, we know having a girl would be different, but we didn't realize how different until she was born. Our angel is small, very small so we get asked all the time if she is ok and if she has something wrong with her. At first it was frustrating, but now we feel it is our job to educate people. I try to politely reply, she is perfectly healthy, she has Down Syndrome and so she is small!
    Our children were sent to us for a reason and I believe it is to educate those around us and to let people know how amazing "different" can be. BrynnLe has not only changed our family she has changed our town and I know she will continue to break down those barriers
    . What an amazing ride we will have.

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  27. Greetings from Utah,

    Pip is so adorable, beautiful and oh so precious! Thank you for sharing her with us. And I love your attitude - Pip is blessed to have you as her Momma. She will greatly benefit from knowing she was born perfect, whole and complete.

    I can't wait to see Pip on Ellen!!

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  28. I love her! and I love you! There is this idea in hebrew that the word perfect means "doing that for which you were made" in that sense I and she and my daughter and every other precious baby is perfect!

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  29. I realize you are trying to be a loving mom... but I do not agree with you. What makes us different is NOT what makes us beautiful.

    Now, this is coming from me, a woman who was stoned at school, completely shunned, only called "frankenstein's wife" growing up because I went through the windshield of a car when I was 4 years old. My face was torn apart and re-united by way of a matrix of scars. Then I became deaf and I had huge hearing aids. Add to that, coke bottle glasses.

    My daughter, as you know, also has Down syndrome. I don't think that her extra chromosome is what makes her beautiful. It's her spirit, her life. It's her own self, shining through.

    I think this about all children, all of us. It's not our differences that make us beautiful: it's our sameness. The beauty that lies within us all - the beauty that we all have - it's THAT that makes us beautiful.

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  30. debb kimbrel (NONI)30.3.14

    Greetings! I just found your sweet blog and Pip is absolutely adorable!! My number 1 granddaughter, Emry Faith is 10 yrs old, she is the most beautiful, smart, gifted, Jesus loving, on a mission girl I know! We do not even think of her having DS!! She is a 10 yr old beautiful girl! She plays ball, takes dance, horseback rides, surfs (!), sings, write songs, makes straight A's-need I continue? She just completed a "mission" of collecting over 1000(yes!) pairs of shoes to send to children in the Philippines--because they go to school barefoot. I !just had to let you know-children with DS have many "gifts" given by God, as we all do-teach them and let them use their gift(s)
    Jeremiah 29:11

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  31. Your daughter is absolutely beautiful! I'm saddened that people in this day and age can be so rude, igronant and so cruel about a child! We're all different, every single one of us! Whether black, white, tall, small, blind, musical, academic, artistic, autistic etc. etc., God made us all unique. With our own personalitys, strengths, weaknesses & flaws. Pip shouldn't be 'defined' by her Down syndrome, because there's more to her than the extra chromosome she was born with! That's just a very small part of her! But a very special part of her nether the less! But, from looking at those beautiful pictures, its her personality that beams through those amazing eyes, and that beautiful smile of hers! It's truly captivating! No wonder people are drawn to her! I truly hope with ALL my heart, that you and her NEVER have to deal with people like that again! Although, in reality, I know that is probably wishful thinking. That you will both very likely encounter what I can only describe as clueless idiots' like that again. What I hope, is that you both develop your own way of dealing with this kind of situation if and when it ever arises ! Of letting their negativity roll of you like water off a ducks back. If its not positive ... you didn't hear it! Or maybe strive to 'educate' the ignorant? Many people fear or ridicule what they don't understand and its purely out of ignorance.

    I can't claim to of known a lot about Down syndrome before reading this post. It sparked me to do some research to educate myself! Whilst doing this research I came across this incredibly honest post. Which I thought you may want to read! It is written by a man called Rodger. Who himself confesses to have been ignorant and fearful about people with Down syndrome, until one day he met a girl with Down syndrome who was working at his local Starbucks. After speaking to her he realised that she was the same as you and me. That there was nothing to of been fearful of. You should definitely read it! It has gotten a lot of positive comments from parents of children with DS.
    http://open.salon.com/blog/rogerf1953/2011/02/18/today_i_may_have_actually_learned_something

    If more people would step out of their comfort zones they'd realize that people with DS are human beings with feelings, talents, and dreams. They just have something extra you and I don't have... an extra chromosome. :-)

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  32. What a doll! So happy:) So beautiful!

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  33. I think Pip is absolutely beautiful but of course you don't need me to say that! My daughter who is 5yo wears glasses, and sometimes a patch as well, it irritates me when people ask me with a certain in their voice "ugh what's wrong with her eyes" I did the same thing as you and said 'there's nothing wrong with her eyes' and I walked away. People speak without thinking very often in our world and some even after thinking still decide to be jerks or ignorant anyways. It's quite said that these people who say these things are teaching their children to look at things differently. My daughter has a little boy with Down Syndrome in her class, sweetest boy ever, months had gone by without her even noticing that he was any different from her and then one day she says to me "he doesn't talk mummy" I told her some kids just take longer to learn that's all and she responded with "he's different but that's ok because he's wonderful, he's always hugging everyone, I think he loves everyone hehe" This is the kind of conversation that should take place, not "What's wrong with them?" Kids many see the difference but they don't think anything of it until they are taught otherwise.

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  34. so cute really and loved

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