Sometimes stuffing your face & belting out a big old "FEEECK" helps...For real...

Sometimes it's hard to share always what I'm thinking...I want Happy Soul Project to be a positive & happy place for y'all but I also promised to always be honest & real - Therefore friends, I share all of me...My life, my thoughts, my happiness, my fears, & my bad bloody days... 


And while I think in general I am quite a happy person, I have days where I'm in a rut, want to punch someone in the neck {usually my husband}, feel fat & ugly or just simply miserable about something:


  • I get irrationally irritable, especially with Craig...Stupid things like how he chomps chips on certain days can just drive me batty...I realize after the fact usually that I am irrational or irritable or both, but during the situation he doesn't have a chance of coming out without a snappy comment or more...
  • I'm mouthy...Take the other day at the park...Noal & a bunch of toddlers were peacefully playing on a jungle gym when a bunch of older kids decided to play tag...Big mumma wasn't having it & snapped at them to move on...
  • I'm selfish...Whether it's hiding treats from Craig in the house or eating Noal's last cookie and then looking at him & saying "all done bud"- I have done this more than I want to admit...
  • I get in funks...I have days where nothing fits, my hair is a mess, I don't feel like getting out of my pjs & I want a brownie for breakfast...But as is life- the funks come & go and for the most part I tend to stay on the happier side of things....


That all being said...Yesterday was a stuff my face with cheesecake, drink some red wine & belt out a big old "FEEECK" kinda day...


Found out Pip needs to have a minor surgery on her already operated eye in TWO weeks...This wasn't expected...I knew a few weeks ago that eventually she would need to have her other eye operated on at some point, but thought she was good to go with this one...


That means my darling Pip has another two surgeries to battle, another two times putting her out, another two times recovering & all that follows....And who knows down the road how many more to follow...


On top of that I still have to patch Pip's good eye half of the day...I hate that...I hate being in the grocery store & people staring at her or a little kid in Noal's daycare asking what's wrong with her eye...


I usually try & plan her patch time during hours we are home so that I can avoid all of that whenever possible...



But that's not always the case...I love her little face with or without the patch but Sweet Jesus, I can't wait for the day it's gone...




So ya, yesterday I wasn't my usual "happy" self...


Right after finding out the news, I thankfully met a good friend for lunch & chats...And like any good friend she eased my worry for a few hours, helped stuff my face with cheesecake & held me off from having a major meltdown...


That friend was followed by another - One of my hubby's friends who definitely is a favourite of mine - And the fabulous steak, bottle of red & many laughs was like a lovely band-aid put over the raw wound of the day...


And of course I needed my "FEEECK" call...That call is always to my brother...If I'm having a day, if I find out bad news, if I just need someone to hear me yell "FEEECK" loud & hard, it's my little brother I turn to...


So before you judge - try it....If you're having a bad day- stuff your face with dessert, get a wee buzz on, add some good friends to make you laugh & take a deep breath & belt out from within a good old "FEEECK"...



You'll feel better...I do...I think...



10 comments:

  1. Anonymous14.8.13

    No matter the patch or not, your little Pip is soooo darling and she looks like a very happy baby. The things that bother us most as parents many times go unnoticed by our children based on our reaction to them. Make her patch a "fun" thing and tell her how pretty she is with it. Think of it as an accessory of a sort. She is beautiful and her happiness is what shines through not the patch!

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    1. That's exactly what I've been doing...I normally draw on her patch- Polka dots, hearts, peace signs, you name it...I just hate not being able to see her beautiful eyes...But this too shall pass & trying to make the most of it for now...thanks for commenting...

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  2. Jennifer14.8.13

    And remember that kids are curious and the less we make a big deal of things the less they will! Just answer questions like its no big thingz

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  3. Anonymous15.8.13

    I think these are just blips on the radar in comparison to the beauty of having your little girl in your arms and being able to love her everyday. I, very recently, gave birth to my still born son, Josiah. There is no degree of life that is better or worse and I don't know if this will give you any comfort, but in the light of all that I now know, EVERY moment is precious with the ones we love. In this trial of surgery after surgery savor the moments that she makes you smile, laugh, giggle, and gasp. Savor these moments and rely on the Great Physician ...even when it makes no sense at all.

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing...I am so very sorry to hear about your Josiah...I can't even begin to imagine that pain...I will hold Pip & Noal a bit tighter today...Positive thoughts your way...xoxo

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  4. Anonymous15.8.13

    Surgeries are hard to go through but the end result of being able to give her better sight will make all of this worth it. Bless you and your family for being able to take care of her needs. Brenda

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  5. Thank you for your fantastic blog. Pip is absolutely gorgeous, what a blessing! I love your writing and your humour! You remind me a lot of my younger sister with her 2 daughters with Down's. She had a lot of Feeeck days early on, especially when her youngest was diagnosed with a brain tumour. It was successfully operated on thank God. Both girls are doing really well, they are now 16 and 17. All the best on your journey with Pip ... I know from personal experience the joy that comes from having a chid with Down's, and I believe their siblings are special too because they never lose their compassion and ability to accept others without judgment. Keep smiling!

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  6. Thanks so much for your fantastic blog. Pip and Noal are gorgeous children! I just know that although you are going through tough times now you will emerge from these trying times with joy and gratitude. My sister, Carolyn, has 2 daughters, Emma and Nicki, both with Down's and the early days were especially difficult. The younger one, Nicki, was diagnosed with a brain tumour and had to have life threatening surgery - which was successful, thank God! Carolyn had many, many Feeeck days! And yes, she too could be irrational, irritable, mouthy and selfish. And we all knew about it when she was in a funk! But hey, it's ok to have days like that ... it's human, and soooo understandable! Sometimes she laughed and sometimes she cried, and as her support people we laughed and cried with her. The girls are 16 and 17 now and both are doing really well. They bring us endless joy and laughter these days and I love being their Aunty. I wish you abundant love, peace of mind, and joy on your journey!

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    1. Wow thanks so much for the lovely comments & for sharing your journey with Down syndrome...I love hearing from others who have first hand experience...Your sister & y'all as her support people have been through a lot but so happy to hear joy was on the other side...that's what I'm hoping for with all Pip's surgeries too!!! Thanks for sharing & for being a part of Happy Soul Project...

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