Don't know if it's an American thing or celebrated elsewhere too. 
But the month of October is Down syndrome Awareness Month. 
Here in Canada however we celebrate it for a week, it use to be in November but this year is changing to the end of October. 
This is on top of March 21st, World Down syndrome Day [WDSD]. 
And trust me, I'm all for whooping it up, bringing awareness & shouting my daughter's worth. 
But, it's all changed for me over time. 
Mainly because I don't need to shout it anymore as loudly, because she's old enough to do that herself. 

But at the beginning, I jumped on this month so hard. 
I remember because I pooched Pip's first WDSD so bad.
I was still kinda in shock over her diagnosis. 
Grieving it really and I'm sure a part of that, played into why I shouted so loudly at first.
Pip was recovering from major eye surgery at just 5 weeks old. 
She then went into heart failure, we began prepping to fix that & my own heart was in such a fragile place. 

So, come that first October. 
I went balls-to-the-walls. 
By the end of the month, I was so glad it was over. 
Because I was utterly exhausted with how much I had posted, preached & photographed. 
I had always kinda felt on the outskirts of the "Down syndrome Community" in a sense. 
I mean, I was given that diagnosis but quickly had to put it up on a shelf while I dealt with keeping my daughter alive & all the complexities that followed.
And while some of them are typical or common with people that have Down syndrome. 
My daughter seemed to be an anomaly. 
Shoot a Pandora's box really. 
And the hits kept coming & coming. 
To the point where I held my breath every Doctor's appointment because I was terrified to hear what she had next.
And with each new diagnosis, I kept feeling further & further away from the Down syndrome part of her. 
It's like I've never even got time to catch my breath & take that part of her down again from the shelf. 
Dust it off and really look at what it means. 
Because everything else she has, in a sense has taken over. 
And in a weird way, I feel like I don't fit in with any one group. 
And every month or week it feels like, there is some sort of Awareness piece of her, that I need to share or acknowledge. 
And some, I'm looking at you Type-One-Diabetes. 
Heck, even you pain-in-the-arse Celiac Disease. 
I don't want to "celebrate" them.
But, with Down syndrome, I do. 
And if I'm being completely honest, I am actually extremely jealous of those that have a child with "just" Down syndrome. 
I wish that were me. 
I love October and seeing my social media feeds flooded with the beautiful faces of those with Down syndrome. 
I adore moms & dads sharing information & seeing awareness light up the month. 
I just never got to have, just that. 


But, I leave you with this. 
I love this child beyond what I thought love was. 
She has changed me more than anyone ever could. 
I am gratefully honoured every single day I get to be her Mom. 
And that largely is because of the Down syndrome piece of Pip....


#DownSyndromeAwareness
#LifeWithPip
#IWillShoutHerWorth
#TillTheDayIDie
#ILoveBeingHerMom
#AndILoveThisPieceOfHer
#happysoulproject