My first kid, turns SEVEN today. 
And as I sit down, to think about what I want to tell him. 
I write, "I feel all sorts of things". 
Yet, he has no idea the gravity or the real kick-in-the-teeth kinda week I've actually had. 
And he might not ever understand the wild-ride-of-an-emotional rollercoaster, I've been on the past few days. 

Pip has been fighting a bacterial infection. 
And with type-one-diabetes, it makes everything incredibly complicated. 
She's so uber clingy. 
Not wanting to eat.
Yet, has high BG's.
So giving LOTS of insulin - amounts that would normally tank her. 
Then living always on the verge of when things will flip. 
Please, other #T1DParents, tell me you get what I mean.

Then one of my closest friends in the world, 
got in a MAJOR car accident. 
Where she broke her freaking back. 
And the car was flipped upside down. 
But, her boys were hanging from their seatbelts. 
And she just leaped into action. 
Went momma-mode & got them free. 
I'm in awe & so very thankful they are still here. 

And then my bestfriend, since we were babies in our church's nursery. 
Had her son 12 years ago today.
And she always said, she was gonna have three. 
But, as soon as he came.
I loudly proclaimed him as my Fav. 
My own mother, told me that was "not nice",
and that I was probably making the other children feel bad. 
But, yet I still did it. 
Then he got cancer. 
And now he's my favourite little boy up in heaven. 
And I got a new one here on earth.
Who oddly enough shares the exact same birthday.

My son, Noal was born 3 weeks early, on Maiysn's 5th birthday.
We thought it Fate then. 
But, now know it's bonded us forever.

And while it makes me beyond emotional each birthday since we've lost him. I will never be able to understand my best friend's pain. 

Today my son opened a card from his Auntie Laurs. 
He smiled at what she wrote & all the new Hockey cards she picked out. 
We talked about Maiysn & acknowledged how sad his mom must be feeling. 
And how lucky I felt to get to be able to celebrate the guts outta him. 

And while, I did just that. 
I loved him up so very much. 
My heart ached for my dear friend. 
Who would give literally anything, 
to have her sweet boy back. 

On top of that already helluva a big week. 
Found out yesterday that Pip's knee surgery wasn't successful. 
Let out a wild "FECK" in front of the Doctor, before I could even stop myself. 

So, yeah, I'd say, I'm feeling all sorts of feels indeed. 
And this doesn't even get into how I can't wrap my head around how much I love my birthday boy, or how quickly time is fast-forwarding by. 

[End of sidenote.]

My Noal,

Today you turn SEVEN. 
And I feel all sorts of things. 

"How can this bloody be happening SOOOO fast!!!"
"Man, Alive I love that boy so so so much."


"I hope we remember these days forever."

Because, if you haven't already notice.
Time has a way of making things fade. 
So, by the time you grow up,
you may only remember the really BIG moments. 
And not so much, the day-to-day.

But, I hope I remember them for you. 
For us. 
For a time later in life.
When you need to remember who you are. 

And what you come from and 
why you are, how you are. 

So, things like how, you somehow have this magically ability to make others laugh. 
And outta all three kids, I love that you are the most cuddly. 
I want you to remember that you have these momma-bear-characteristics with your siblings & anyone littler than you.
That you speak your mind, stand your ground even if it's when you dramatically downright refuse a berry - any kind - like I'm trying to give you rat posion - every time - I try. 
I hope you never give up, kinda like how no matter what since you could, you have at least 8 excuses to get outta bed every SINGLE night. 
I want you to always be just the sweetest, like when you leave me little hand written notes in a jewelry box, you bought me at your school's yard sale last year. 
And I want you to remember this gentleness about you, when you still like me to rub your back, as I sing a song, I sang to you when you were a baby. 

And even though you are only SEVEN. 
It's hard to even remember you as a baby. 
Life somehow becomes so in the NOW. 

So, I get that the details won't be seeped deep. 
And that you're gonna only recall the most memorable moments or the ones I wanna forget.
Like a few days ago, when I watched you & Theo. 
Bang heads in just the perfect way, 
that the end of the bed took him down. 
There was lots of blood.
You bravely ran for towels & 
then calmed him down, while pressing against the wound, as I ran for ster-strips. 
And thank freaking God, for our hack job of an effort. 
You did great kid!

But, you do great every day. 
No other seven year old I know. 
Takes after a sister, 
like you take after our Pip. 
You, are that Girl's HERO. 
She loves you so.

I love how you stand up for her. 
And try to teach people to not be afraid. 
To think differently. 
When all those kids, the first day of summer camp. 
Kept asking ya, "What's wrong with her?"
I'm so glad you handle it like you do. 
You're one of the good ones, Kid. 
I'm so proud to be your mom. 
I always think I got so lucky, with you.

And, no other seven year old, 
knows how to treat diabetic lows 
or steer people away from food that has gluten in it. 
Or knows how to call 911 or where insulin & a needle to save their sister's life is kept.

You, have a lot on your plate kid. 
Not, only are you busy being a KID.
But, you deal with loads of different stuff, 
other seven year olds don't even know about. 
And I just want you to know, 
that I know that. 
And I'm so proud of how you have handled everything. 
And I love seeing who you are, emerge these last few years, 
because they become the core, 
of who you become...

So, my darling 21-FREAKING-HOURS

I know what you go through as a seven year old, is kinda extraordinary. 
But, I want you to know, 
if who you become later in life is ANYONE, 
like who you are today. 
Pleasure is all mine. 

Because, Son, you are magnificent!!!

You are charming. 
And confident. 
Silly & full of spice. 
You are chatty & kind. 
And loud & slightly obnoxious at times. 
You are freaking hilarious. 
And you're pleasant to be around.

And even though at certain times you can be a down-right-annoying-bratty-little-bugger. 
All in all. 


And, Noal, I sure hope to GOD
who YOU are today. 
Carries you through. 
Whatever life has planned for you throughout.

Happy Birthday Kid.
I love you so.
You're my fav boy on the planet...